Schrodinger’s Cat

It kind of odd. Yesterday I read a blog post about Schrodinger’s Cat and today I re-watched a re-run of The Big Bang Theory that used it as a way for Sheldon to give advice to Leonard and Penny…

If you don’t know Schrodinger’s Cat here is the jist: There is a cat in a box with cyanide with a radioactive trigger with an unknown half-life. So the person outside of the box doesn’t know if the cat has been poisoned by the cyanide or is still alive. The question is “is the cat alive or dead”.

If one neglects to look at the quantum physics portions of this thought experiment, one can see it as Schrodinger simply giving the world some advice. You have to open the box to know if the cat is alive or dead. With out opening it up at least somewhat you will just sit in wonder what has happened inside the box or what could have happened inside the box.

From the BBT episode I realized that I like Leonard and Penny could apply this to my own life.

I saw Ethan today and might I say that he is getting more attractive as we get older (not surprised his older brother has done the same thing). Seeing him brought back a jolt of feelings. I started to think about maybe seeing if he wanted to get coffee or something after I get back from backpacking in Arkansas. I can’t know if anything will/can be there unless I open up this metaphorical box. I have decided though not to bring up anything about a relationship unless he does. I don’t want to be the reason he comes back to Texas (which he doesn’t particularly like) and takes a job he has been offered in our home town just to be closer to me. That scares me. I don’t want to have that much affect on someone’s life (unless it was what would make them happy, but with him I worry).

It scares me a ton though. When he goes back to school he will be back in the Chicago area and I will be even farther south than our home town. How could we even start a relationship. What is worse, the possibility of him not coming back at all…

The things that bothered me in high school (granted we were 16 and 15) hopefully have changed with age and maturity. But then even if those are gone some I would struggle to see that they have changed being so far away. And even if they have changed we just replaced those things with a great distance between us.

Essentially I am super confused and am not sure what is going on inside of me. I have always gotten small butterflies when I have seen him, but nothing like this. Its never beens o bad that I have wanted to do something about it.

I ended up texting him about going and getting coffee after I talked to my roommate/best friend. She validated that coffee would be a good idea and that she agrees that I shouldn’t bring up anything about a relationship until I was 100% sure. I hope that I can figure something out in the week that I will have after I get back from my trip. He hasn’t responded to my text message. Sometimes he isn’t the best at responding, but I feel like I may have also thrown him for a loop. I hope that he at least agrees to go get coffee.

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